by Isa Maria Seminega of Noisette Marketing & Noisette Kids
{Happy Turtle print by Noisette Kids for Ganbare Nippon Japan relief fundraiser}
I hadn’t planned to tell my full story. It’s still quite raw and very personal. I never thought I’d be ready to tell the world what brought me here but Jessika’s story made me realise that I owe her and you, the real me. As someone who tells stories for a living through marketing and PR for small businesses, I advocate telling your story to connect with others. I write stories for my clients, expressing them in a way that gains attention from potential customers and the press. Yet I struggle to tell mine.
I have always told stories. As a child used to write books in the school holidays and used to come up with elaborate ideas that I was sure would be the next big seller. I found it easy to tell stories verbally, to get people enthralled and hooked but would struggle to write it down. Eventually, as an adult, I was diagnosed with dyslexia. After all those years no-one had guessed I had a problem and my perfectionist nature meant I struggled on without asking for help. My academic success masked the daily difficulty I faced.
My journey into self-employment started with redundancy. A week before I was due to go back to work after a years maternity leave, I was told they didn’t need me back. I was devastated by despite the upset I had a seed of an idea in my head. Maybe I could work for myself? As the reality of needing to start work fast hit, I pushed the idea aside and I started applying for marketing and administration jobs.
Then I discovered I was pregnant. It was a lovely surprise and I thought it was the perfect opportunity for me to be a stay at home mother for a little longer.
At the 13 week sonogram they identified a problem. Almost instantly they noticed the baby looked small for dates, measuring only 10 weeks. The nuchal fold measurement was high and we were told it was likely Edward’s syndrome (Trisomy 18). Trisomy 18 is a chromosome problem and they said our baby was“not compatible with life”. The hospital booked us for further tests but told us I’d likely miscarry before then. From that moment nothing mattered to me more than my family, all thoughts of looking for work firmly pushed aside.
{lyrics from I Will Carry You by Selah}
I spent a week grieving for my unborn child who at this point was still alive inside me. That week felt like a thousand weeks, most definitely the longest of my life. When Joseph napped, I searched online for everything I could find about Trisomy 18 and families that had been touched by it. Crying for hours, reading their stories, scared at what was in store for us. When Joseph woke from his naps I’d pull myself together again and get on with being a Mum to him leaving the grieving behind.
I was praying for a miracle. For me that meant that I would get to hold our baby and say goodbye. I am a believer that everything happens for a reason. Rightly or wrongly, I never once prayed that our baby would not be sick. In my heart I believe that our baby was perfect. He was how he was meant to be and instead I focused on getting the chance to say goodbye and praying he would feel no pain.
By 16 weeks a scan showed our baby had died. As silent tears fell down my face I was strangely calm. We knew it was coming. It was our second miscarriage so I knew we’d get through it and we thought we knew what to expect. The hospital booked me to come back in 48 hours so they could induce me for labour but less than 24 hours later it started on its own. I hadn’t realised it would happen that fast and before the medical induction. Unexpectedly, I ended up delivering our tiny son in our bathroom.
At the hospital I got the chance to hold our son and kiss him goodbye. My prayers to hold him had been answered and I vowed that I was going to do something great with my life. I didn’t want to waste anymore time in a job I hated. If my life plan was to lose a child in this way I didn’t want it to be for nothing.
Two months later post mortem results confirmed Trisomy 18 and that our baby was a boy. We named him Michael and the hospital arranged a beautifully touching funeral for us. Seeing our tiny son’s white coffin is the most painful thing I have ever experienced.
In November 2009 a month after our son’s funeral, I listed my first marketing plans on Etsy.
I worked around Joseph’s naps and by January I found I was pregnant again. My pregnancy with Lily exhausted me! I felt the need to draw and started using Illustrator to doodle little designs for children. Eight weeks after she was born I launched Noisette Illustration (now Noisette Kids). It’s another project close to my heart. I make happy things for children and I hope to grow the business in the future.
For now most of my time is spent on Noisette Marketing. I’ve also launched The Academy blog to share business advice with even more people. Helping creative s achieve their dreams of making a living doing what they love is my passion. I want everyone to realise that anything is possible. Life sometimes sends us challenges big and small but it’s up to us to use our will to create opportunities. I’m constantly inspired by the creative community and love that I can be involved from both sides as a marketer and a maker.
Editors note: I want to take a moment for us all to give Isa a standing ovation for her courage, her strong beautiful heart and feeling safe enough to share her story here. I am so honored by her generosity in letting us into her life and loss. Her compassion and genuine love for helping others succeed radiates and is what makes her such a force for good in the handmade community. Knowing this piece of her story only makes me adore and admire her more. You are amazing Isa-thank you.
I also hope you’ll join in with us as part of the What’s Your Story campaign over at The Academy. Telling our stories is hard but so much easier when we do it together!
